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ALL SONGS WRITTEN BY ME

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I’m a hedonist
I get what I want but don’t know what to do with it
Nothing’s permanent
I’m a pacifist 
I can start a fight but I can never finish it
Don’t like argument, no

I do what I can to hide it
Bare minimum
Light me up and I’m ignited
Libra in mars
Irrational but you can simply 
Blame it on the stars 
My contradiction’s my religion 
Won’t stop

I’m guided by the moon (uh huh)
It leads me 
My gemini moon makes it hard to reach me
Ooo (uh huh)
So dreamy
You’ll never know me even when you finally meet me
Constant indecision, can’t catch a break
Clear-cut intuition, no mistakes 
I’m shackled by the moon (uh huh)
It keeps me
My gemini moon makes it hard to free me

I’m a summer bitch
In the winter I feel so out of my element 
Cold and desolate
Yeah, I’m delicate
But my friends will tell you I have quite the temperament 
Just don’t make me upset 

I do what I can to fight it
Bare minimum
Light me up and I’m ignited
Libra in mars
Emotional but you can blame it 
On my cancer sun
My contradiction’s my religion 
Won’t stop

I’m guided by the moon (uh huh)
It leads me 
My gemini moon makes it hard to reach me
Ooo (uh huh)
So dreamy
You’ll never know me even when you finally meet me
Constant indecision, can’t catch a break
Clear-cut intuition, no mistakes 
I’m shackled by the moon (uh huh)
It keeps me
My gemini moon makes it hard to free me

I'm such a gemini
I'm such a gemini moon

Constant indecision, can’t catch a break
Clear-cut intuition, no mistakes 

I do what I can to fight it
Bare minimum
Light me up and i’m ignited
Libra in mars
Irrational but you can simply
Blame it on the stars 
My contradiction’s my religion 
Can’t make it stop

I’m guided by the moon (uh huh)
It leads me 
My gemini moon makes it hard to reach me
Ooo (uh huh)
So dreamy
You’ll never know me even when you finally meet me
Constant indecision, can’t catch a break
Endless intuition, no mistakes 
I’m shackled by the moon (uh huh)
Release me
My gemini moon makes it hard to be me

I'm such a gemini
I'm such a gemini moon
I'm such a gemini
I'm such a gemini moon
I'm such a gemini
I'm such a gemini moon

You don't have a hold on me
No, you'll never get control of me
But I bet you wish that you could
Never getting over me
Even though you were supposed to be
And I'm really thinkin' you should
I just needed room to breathe
I'm exactly where I need to be
Now I'm feeling so good
All you ever do is take
But everything accumulates
Til you're entombed

I realized, after years of being nice
When I took my own advice, you stopped being so polite, yeah
You don't think about anybody but yourself
But tell me again how you can't keep your friends

I've been I've been
I've been moving on
I'm in I'm in
Ataraxia

Moved out of the galaxy 'cause you went supernova
Thought that I would miss you but I'm colder than Europa
You collected enemies like it was an achievement
Never gave apologies, always had a reason
Where is that self-awareness?
Are you embarrassed?
If the shoe fits then wear it
But I'm not gonna stick around to see if you change
Never had connections you could maintain
Hang with friends that make me laugh
While you get high and take a nap
When you hear this hope you gasp
Oh! Then you can kiss my ahahaha

I realized, after years of being nice
When I took my own advice, you stopped being so polite, yeah
You don't care about anybody but yourself
But tell me again how you lose all your friends

I've been I've been
I've been moving on
I'm in I'm in
Ataraxia
I've been I've been (I've been, I've been moving on)
I've been moving on
I'm in I'm in (I'm in ataraxia)
Ataraxia
I've been I've been (I've been, I've been moving on)
I've been moving on
I'm in I'm in (I'm in ataraxia)
Ataraxia

Now you're all alone and I'm living free
You don't have a hold anymore on me
Really had to go, make a new routine
So long so long, I'm happy
Now you're all alone
And I'm living free
You don't have a hold
Anymore on me
Really had to go, make a new routine
So long so long, I'm happy

Now you're all alone and I'm living free
You don't have a hold anymore on me
Really had to go, make a new routine
So long so long, I'm happy
Now you're all alone
And I'm living free
You don't have a hold
Anymore on me
Really had to go, make a new routine
So long so long, I'm happy

Now you're all alone and I'm living free
You don't have a hold anymore on me
Really had to go, make a new routine
So long so long, I'm happy
Now you're all alone
And I'm living free
You don't have a hold
Anymore on me
Really had to go, make a new routine
So long so long, I'm happy

I catch you holding back, I watch you pull away
I reel you in again, why won't you be my friend?
I tell you all the time you're always on my mind, you're everything I like
Now I just reminisce, but what comes after this?
Yeah yeah yeah yeah

We could've called it love
That's what I thought it was
I gave you everything (but not enough)
I never liked the chase
Now you can have your space
It seems you only love yourself

Am I just obsessed?
Too easily impressed?
Do you have no regrets?
Or do you wish that
We were still intact?
Would you erase the past
If you could take it back?

Unreciprocated, you made me so jaded
The love we once had faded
And limerence replaced it, face it

I miss you when you're here, you seem to disappear
You act so cavalier, and make it very clear
That you are over us, filled with indifference
Deprive me of your touch, like you don't give a fuck, I've had enough
Yeah yeah yeah yeah

We used to call it love (love)
That's what you said it was (was)
I gave you everything (but now I'm done)
I never liked the chase (chase)
Now you can have your space (space)
Turns out you only love yourself

Am I just obsessed?
Too easily impressed?
Do you have no regrets?
Or do you wish that
We were still intact?
Would you erase the past
If you could take it back?

Unreciprocated, you made me so jaded
The love we once had faded
And limerence replaced it, face it

I catch you holding back, I watch you pull away
I catch you holding back, I watch you pull away
I catch you holding back
I catch you holding back, I watch you pull away
I catch you holding back, I watch you pull away
I catch you holding back

 

GEMINI MOON

ATARAXIA

LIMERENCE

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I HAD A DREAM/AWAKE

BLOOM

FRUIT WATER SZN

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WAISTLINE

Tell me why you're not picking up
You don't answer my call
I know you got your phone, babe
Needy 'cause I'm feeling alone
And I wanted to know
Are you down to stay up late?
Need release, pretty please
Let me in, don't hide yourself from me
You know what I mean, yeah

Grab me by my waistline, baby
You do things that can drive me crazy
The way you move, it really makes me
Shaky, can't fake it
And all I want is you in my head
Make me open up like you do in bed
And I don't think I'll ever love again
Don't make it end, don't make it end

Time with you is never enough
Missing you when you're gone
You know where you belong, boo
Wrap me up in all that you are
Not afraid of the dark
I want every part of you
Underneath silky sheets
When you're lost you'll find your way to me
I'll wait patiently

It's heavenly when you
Are next to me breathing heavily
I like it, I need it
You give, I receive it
What I want the most isn't
What's underneath your clothes, is it?
What you never show
I want it, I need it
Hit play then repeat it

Grab me by my waistline, baby
You do things that can drive me crazy
The way you move, it really makes me
Shaky, can't fake it
And all I want is you in my head
Make me open up like you do in bed
And I don't think I'll ever love again
Don't make it end, don't make it end

Give me something I can keep
I hang off every word you speak
Sex so good I oversleep
Love so strong it makes me weak

Grab me by my waistline, baby
You do things that can drive me crazy
The way you move, it really makes me
Shaky, can't fake it
And all I want is you in my head
Make me open up like you do in bed
And I don't think I'll ever love again
Don't make it end, don't make it end

Give me something I can keep (Something something, baby)
I hang off every word you speak (Speak speak speak speak)
Sex so good I oversleep (Over oversleep, over oversleep)
Love so strong it makes me weak

Was it real?
Did I make it up in my head?
Do you feel
Even just a little bad?
Do you wish
You could call me like you used to?
If you did
Maybe I would take you back

Tearing at the seams
Circling extremes
You tasted oh so sweet
Back when your lips loved me

Was it me?
Did I change the plans that we made?
Suddenly
I can't look you in the face
I believed, I believed
We were monuments of passion
Meant to be
In an art hall on display

One foot out the door
But still asking for more
How can you know you're sure
When you've said this before?

Barely here
You left us in a liminal space
In between the lines you made
So unclear
We can't let this go to waste
You were my everything

Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be
You and me
You and me
Meant to be
Meant to be, ah

Barely here
You left us in a liminal space
In between the lines you made
So unclear
We can't let this go to waste
You were my everything

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Hear me out, just hear me out
I need to get up off this couch, and outta town
I'm feeling like I'm ready now to get a house
In sunny Cali where the drought means no more clouds, yeah
Here I go, out on my own
Yeah I just wanna be alone, don't come along
Now I can leave behind the cold
You see me glow?
I think I know where I belong
A different coast, yeah

I've been California dreamin'
Tired of the bitter seasons
Out the door, goodbye, I'm leavin'
Can't stay here, I've got no reason

California dreamin' (Ooh)
California dreamin' (Ooh)
Outrun all my demons (Ooh)
Live a life worth livin' (Ooh)

West coast vibin'
I see it and I like it
Tired of the ice cold
East coast climate

On a roll, I'm on a roll
Now I go where I wanna go, I take control
Ain't got the money for the bills, head over heels
Maybe I wanna run away from how it feels

I thought we were gonna make it
It's too late for us to change it
Haven't met, 'cause now we're strangers
Said goodbye, not see you later

California dreamin' (Ooh)
California dreamin' (Ooh)
Outrun all my demons (Ooh)
Live a life worth livin' (Ooh)

West coast vibin'
I see it and I like it
Tired of the ice cold
East coast climate
Need that ultraviolet
I really wanna try it
I've been doing better
On a sunshine diet
West coast vibin'
I see it and I like it
Tired of the ice cold
East coast climate
Need that ultraviolet
I really wanna try it
I've been doing better
On a sunshine diet

California dreamin' (Ooh)
California dreamin' (Ooh)
Outrun all my demons (Ooh)
Live a life worth livin' (Ooh)

It's time I let you go
I was so comfortable
You took a piece of me
I'll never see return
Think I should start again
Run from where we began
Said I would never leave
But now we've reached the end

LIMINAL SPACE

CALIFORNIA

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INERTIA

Give a little, get nothing back
Feel so brittle you could collapse
Tell yourself in the mirror, "can you just relax?"
And you'll never feel settled in
Sitting comfortably in your skin
Tell me honestly when you'll take all of that in
Can't ever be yourself, the way you see yourself
The way you act like you're too good to ever treat yourself
You never ask for help
And you get overwhelmed
And then you make it out to be about the hand you're dealt
The stars ain't misaligned
You've just near lost your mind
Your head is bigger than the space in which you occupy
It makes you dizzy, yeah yeah, yeah yeah
Just take it easy, yeah yeah, yeah yeah
I can't heal, but I can't give it up
I don't feel, but I'm afraid to jump
Stuck in here, and I think it's because (Now I'm numb)
I can't heal, but I can't give it up
They don't feel the pain I've overcome
It's not real, don't think it ever was
Give up on all you love before it's all begun
Would rather suffer instead of working hard enough
You'll start to wear away, give others hell to pay
For all the stress inside your head that only you create
I'm holding my breath, hoping you'll get to
Give it your best in all that you do
Accepting pity, yeah yeah, yeah yeah
Too fucking easy, yeah yeah, yeah yeah
I can't heal, but I can't give it up (Oooh)
I don't feel, but I'm afraid to jump
Stuck in here, and I think it's because (Now I'm numb)
I can't heal, but I can't give it up (I can't, I can't, I can't)
They don't feel the pain I've overcome (They won't, they won't, they won't)
It's not real, don't think it ever was
Give a little, get nothing back
Feel so brittle you could collapse
Oh, when will, when will you take all of that in?

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MOVEMENT

I was giving in, living in
A chronic state of slow motion, feeling frozen
And I was dreaming big, thoughts were quick but I was lost in a moment
I was broken

I need I need I need I need
I need to re-evaluate my conviction
Need some friction
Gimme gimme gimme gimme
Give me a taste and now I've got an addiction

Cruising, my life is a movie
I'm feeling some movement, some movement
Hazy, but it feels amazing
I'm feeling some movement, some movement
Got me like ha ha ha
Flying by, speed of light
I'm like ha ha ha
Losing sleep, making time
I'm like ah ah ah
Burning bright, dynamite
I'm not feeling right, but I can't let it die, yeah

I was falling short, wanting more but settling for the simple, superficial
And I just need a sign, think it's time
Please just give me the signal, give me the signal

I need I need I need I need
I need to re-evaluate my conviction
Need some friction
Gimme gimme gimme gimme
Give me a taste and now I've got an addiction

Cruising, my life is a movie
I'm feeling some movement (Movement) some movement (Movement)
Hazy, but it feels amazing
I'm feeling some movement (Movement) some movement (Movement)
Got me like ha ha ha
Flying by, speed of light
I'm like ha ha ha
Losing sleep, making time
I'm like ah ah ah
Burning bright, dynamite
I'm not feeling right, but I can't let it die, yeah

Staying up, losing sleep
Taking drugs, on repeat
Staying up, losing sleep
Taking drugs, on repeat

Cruising, my life is a movie
I'm feeling some movement (Movement) some movement (Movement)
Hazy, but it feels amazing
I'm feeling some movement (Movement) some movement (Movement)
Got me like ha ha ha
Flying by, speed of light
I'm like ha ha ha
Losing sleep, making time
I'm like ah ah ah
Burning bright, dynamite
I'm not feeling right, but I can't let it die, yeah

I had a dream we were floating in space
And I had a dream that it all went away

You only lose what you give up
You think it's hard, it's not hard enough
Ooh, that's on you
You chase yourself in circles all day
Pushing off what makes you happy
Ooh, that's on you
Wait a minute

Wait a minute and then start again
Things were better when we could pretend that
Anything we wanted we could get
And we wouldn't even have to try
Never thought that I could see it work
Sabotage and blame the universe so
I would never have to feel the hurt, no

But I'm taking my time, doing it right
Opened my eyes and I see
I just never tried, I made up a lie
To tell myself it wasn't worth it
Now I carry the weight of what it would take
To own my mistakes
And live the life I cultivate
I just have to concentrate

Is this reality?
Where I'm supposed to be, ah
I'd rather fall asleep
And live inside a dream, ah

Tried to be like everybody else
And I thought I blended in so well that
Everyone around me couldn't tell
Every day was like a living hell
I'd made up my mind that I was never gonna
Live the way I want to
Now I know I can break through

So I'm taking my time, doing it right
Opened my eyes and I see
I'm perfectly fine, not out of my mind
And all the shit made it worth it
Now, I carry the weight of what it would take
To own my mistakes
And live the life I cultivate
I am finally awake

Is this reality?
Where I'm supposed to be?
I'd rather fall asleep

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I can't go far with my hands tied
Think that I'm gonna cut them loose
Now I'm sure of what I like
So I know what I have to do
April days fade away into
Memories we won't save
But now on our own, it's time that we grow

Touch me real soft
Fabric melts off (I wanna feel you)
See my petals?
I'm in bloom

In the sunlight I come alive
Need to see you through these brand new eyes
And the part I'm leaving behind
Is now becoming something new, breaking free from my cocoon

Now I'm opening my mind
Fantasies that are taking root
If you water them tonight
In the morning we pick the fruit
April days fade away into
Cloudy skies, summer rain
Can't do it alone, I think we should grow

Touch me real soft
Fabric melts off (I wanna feel you)
Weaving our love
Like a loom
Now the winter frost (The winter frost)
Is replaced by raindrops (Raindrops)
See my petals?
I'm in bloom

In the sunlight I come alive
Need to see you through these brand new eyes
And the part i'm leaving behind
Is now becoming something new, breaking free from my cocoon

My body is in bloom
My body is in bloom
My body is in bloom
My body is in bloom

Water's warm, why don't we jump right in? (Need you closer, so much closer, baby)
Shed the excess, let's go for a swim (Uh huh uh huh uh huh uh huh)
Yeah

In the sunlight I come alive
Need to see you through these brand new eyes
And the part I'm leaving behind
Is now becoming something new, breaking free from my cocoon

My body is in bloom
My body is in bloom
My body is in bloom
My body is in bloom

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Pretty thing looking right back at me
She's a dream, all the things I wished to be
Won't go back to where I started
'Cause I've got everything I wanted, yeah

I've been drinking matcha tea
I quit smoking, eating green for you
And for me too, yeah
Waking up at 8 AM
Sleeping well, been getting REM, I do
I'm practically brand new

Took back my control and I feel that serotonin
Uh huh (uh huh), uh huh (uh huh)
Finally letting go and I feel all these emotions
Fruit water season, drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down, drink drink it down

Bittersweet, the way that happy looks on me
'Cause I believed that nothing good was meant to be
Think it's time that I accept it
When life is good I won't reject it, no no

I've been drinking matcha tea
Working out and eating clean for you (for you, for you)
And for me too (yeah yeah yeah yeah)
Waking up at 8 AM
Sleeping well, been getting REM, I do
Baby, I just can't lose

Took back my control and I feel that serotonin
Uh huh (uh huh), uh huh (uh huh)
Finally letting go and I feel all these emotions
Fruit water season, drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down and up and up we go
Drink it down, drink drink it down

Lemon, lime
All my time will now be spent on me
Ain't nobody like me, sugar sweet like iced tea
Hot, I keep it spicy
I'm thriving

Taking back control and I feel that serotonin
Uh huh (uh huh), uh huh (uh huh)
Finally letting go and I feel all these emotions
Fruit water season, drink me down and up and up you go
Drink me down and up and up you go
Drink me down and up and up you go
(Ain't nobody like me, sugar sweet like iced tea)
Drink me down and up and up you go
Drink me down, drink drink me down

I HAD A DREAM/
AWAKE

BLOOM

FRUIT WATER SZN